Success vs. Greatness

Many people in our world make decisions in their lives based on becoming successful. Parents and society make success the primary goal for the next generation. Most of us judge and either accept or reject our peers based on "worldly success," which for most means; a good job that earns lots of money, becoming famous (a household name), getting what we want, and being concerned about what we will receive. Basically, "worldly success" is an all about me attitude!

Dr. Tim Kimmel in his book, Raising Kids for True Greatness gives us another alternative. He is a proponent of raising kids for greatness not success. Dr. Kimmel suggests that true greatness:

• Looks upward, then outward.
• Looks for God's agenda.
• Celebrates altruism.
• Focuses on giving.
• Grieves over the injustices in the world.
• Makes a lasting impact in the world. (XII)

These are the qualities of our great spiritual leaders and our peace-makers. They are the Mother Teresa's among us. They are our neighbors who are behind the scenes feeding the hungry, sewing blankets for the homeless, working for social justice, and becoming the voice for the voiceless.

Our media bombards us with the tragedies in our world, until it is overshadowed by the infidelities and scandalous lives of our "successful." They pull us into the trap of worldly success as they bypass the millions of everyday great people who truly make a difference in our neighborhoods, communities, and in our world.

I encourage you to evaluate your life, is it one focused solely on worldly success or is it a life destine for greatness.

Don't be mistaken, there is nothing wrong with financial success and being proud of one's accomplishments. In fact, spiritually it is our heritage to live a life of abundance. It is when that success becomes paramount in our lives and the basic needs of those around us go unnoticed and unmet. We become so self-centered, we forget we are here to serve.

© 2010 by Becky Benes
www.onenessoflife.com

A Burden Shared

Have you noticed that a burden shared is halved; yet a joy shared is doubled.

We are called to help one another and lift their burdens. "Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ" Galatians 6:2. This is our purpose in life. Most people wonder aimlessly seeking their God given purpose. They take courses, participate in retreats, spend hours in counseling, all seeking "their true purpose."

I suggest that you look around your life at this moment in time and ask yourself, "Who do I know who needs some help?" An elderly neighbor, a friend, a stranger in line at the store, a newspaper salesperson, a child, a teacher. . . . Reach out and lend a hand, let your hand be the hand of God, serving another.

When you do this, you will be fulfilled, your purpose will be found, you will find joy. Joy is in the giving and in the sharing of burdens.

© 2010 by Becky Benes
www.onenessoflife.com

God does not have favorites

Many religious claim to be the "chosen ones" of God. These convictions are the cause of many a war, and many atrocities in our world. However, when observing nature it is clear that God-our Creator, does not have favorites.

The sun shines and the rain falls on all people. The fruits and nuts of trees are food abundantly and freely supplied for all people and animals. Hurricanes, earth quakes, and tsunamis also have no preference of people they affect. These are only a few of the examples of God's lack of favoritism among creation.

Jesus and Buddha both taught this idea.

Your father in heaven makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the righteous and on the unrighteous. Matthew 5:45

That great cloud rains down on all whether their nature is superior or inferior. The light of the sun and the moon illuminates the whole world, both him who does well and him who does ill, both him who stands high and him who stands low. Sadharmapundarika Sutra 5

These teachings challenge me to practice acceptance and release judgement about people, places, and things. They also teach me that life is fair, it is my reaction and judgement about life that creates discourse and angst or peace and happiness.

All of creation is given life, so that we may enjoy all things.

© 2010 by Becky Benes
www.onenessoflife.com

Buddhist Wisdom

Do not underestimate good, thinking it will not affect you. Dripping water can fill a pitcher, drop by drop; one who is wise is filled with good, even if one accumulates it little by little. Dhammapada 9:7

When we practice random acts of kindness in our lives, we gradually build a reservoir of goodness which fills our hearts and actually changes the hearts of others. Have you ever noticed how a smile or a compliment can change a person's attitude and their work day. This small gesture will ripple out into the lives of others and who knows how many dogs won't get kicked after work.

Practicing kindness is one example of how something small can grow into something huge. What we do daily slowly affects our lives and those with whom we have contact, especially our children. What do you chose to practice and spread?

© 2010 by Becky Benes
www.onenessoflife.com

Who are you hanging out with?

"Walk with wise men and you will become wise, but the companion of fools will fare badly (Proverbs13:20).

This is so true. You can really tell a lot about a person by their friends.

I once had a spiritual director bring this message home to roost with me.

I was a member of a singles group which came together weekly to learn about how to have healthy relationships. We rotated group leaders. When it was my turn to lead, I asked my spiritual director, "what should I speak about?"

She gently stated, "Becky, that is crazy! You and all of your single friends are trying to learn about relationships from each other. You are all clueless in that area. If you want to learn about successful relationships, met with people who have them!" She then suggested, we talk about our relationship with God and get it in order, then we might be able to have a relationship with another person.

What a wise statement. From that moment, when I seek wisdom in different areas, I walk with wise people whom are experienced in that area. This has proven very beneficial for me. Prior to that I was guilty of walking with fools and I did not fair well.

When we open ourselves to learn from all wise men (and women) of the ages, we become wise.

© 2010 by Becky Benes
www.onenessoflife.com

Wisdom of faith traditions

Even though, I have never met biblical scholar, Marcus Borg, I know we are kindred spirits. His words finally allow me to better define myself to those to whom I speak and write.

"I have lived with Jesus all of my life. . . In adulthood, I have become a non-exclusivist Christian. It seems clear that 'the sacred' has been known in all of the major religious traditions, and I do not think that Christianity is the only adequate religion, even though it is my 'home'" (Jesus &Buddha, 8).

This is what I have found to be true, as I study all major religions and meet people who practice the different faith traditions. The mainstays of the differing faiths are the same. For example, all faith traditions teach:

• The Golden Rule, Treat others the way in which you would like to be treated.
• Love your neighbor
• And Blessed are the Peace makers.

Our life story, as we encounter the God of our understanding, becomes our personal sacred history. Our encounter differs from our neighbors, just as Buddha's differed from Jesus and Jesus from Mohammad. However, their sacred texts are all valuable to those whom embrace them and find meaning in them.

When I can honor and accept my neighbor's life journey as sacred, I find I can accept the faith journey's of my friends from different faiths.


© 2010 by Becky Benes
www.onenessoflife.com

Serenity

God Grant me the Serenity

to accept the things I cannot change,

the courage to change the things I can,

and the wisdom to know the difference.

This prayer sat on our bathroom vanity for years. I read it probably 2 or 3 times per day. It never made sense to me, because I did not comprehend the word serenity.

Through a series of events, and a lot of surrender, I finally experienced serenity-inner peace. Once experienced, serenity became my preferred state of mind and the rest of the prayer made sense to me.

I came to know that there are lots of things in my life that I cannot change: people, places, weather and things. However, there are some big things that I can change: myself, my perception, my decision, and my attitude.

Figuring out these two things opened the door to wisdom in my life. I still forget that there are things I cannot change, and sometimes I don't have the courage to change the things I can. But when I do, my life is serene and I feel happiness and joy.

© 2010 by Becky Benes
www.onenessoflife.com